As you get older, sometimes you become part of the "sandwich generation," caring for your children while also worrying your elderly parents. For me, it is the "older" adults who are so darn childish. I have one parent left. She is a handful, and she is this way because my brother, who is on disability, is still financially dependent on her. And she's 95! One of these days, she won't be there. Then, what will Jay do?
Jay, like other people with family members who are leeches, didn't pay the rent while my mother was in the hospital. She fell out of bed, her leg got bloodied, but she didn't break a leg or suffer a heart attack. Amazingly, she is on insulin and eight medicines and can barely walk but keeps on going. She "should" be in a nursing home or assisted living. She refuses to leave her home for assisted care, refuses to move to the East coast where her daughters are, and refuses to leave her darling, perfect son.
He's no darling. He has financially abused the family for years, gambling and spending her money and expecting everyone else to pay their bills. Walking around toothless and hopped up on pain killers, she prefers his care over mine, even though he recently smashed up the car and they have no funds left from the sale of the house.
What can I do? She COULD go into ADULT FOSTER CARE. Adult foster care is a "real" thing. It isn't just for kids. If you google "adult foster care" for your state you'd find a number you can call. For me, this will be a long road ahead. She believes he is an angel. My own mother-in-law was in adult foster care because she was turning into an alcoholic and couldn't be left alone after her husband died. There are possibilities out there and I am going to investigate!
